As I write this post, it’s the kids first day of school (yesterday). Their first day of school is usually the day that symbolises my new year has begun, like the last month was a practise run and now is the time to get serious about my new years resolutions.
As I take a look back on the previous year I must admit I felt really flat, I felt like I lost a little bit of me. It’s so easy to put on a happy face in photos, but reality is it just wasn’t my year and I want to share with you all my good and bad, keeping it real.
image credit: pktfuel.com
Last year wasn’t my year:
- The kids moved school and I was really concerned about them settling in, they were fine, me not so much.
- Easter last year I started to get very bad lower back pain, it took me over 4 months to finally see a doctor who sent me to a rheumatoid arthritis specialist. Basically, I have arthritis appearing in my lower back, he referred me onto a physio and within 2 sessions I felt the pain diminish. Why did it take me so long to get my back seen to and be in pain for so long, I think I was just too busy??
- We had been looking for a new house for 18 months, since April 2014. Just looking at houses every weekend was very draining and emotional wondering if we will or won’t move, as I was really ready for a change. Thankfully we found one and moved into the new house in December 2015. I love it, we have all settled in so nicely.
- Then with all there is to do to move house, I must have got a little (well, very) stressed and my hair started to fall out again, I’ve learnt that my body can’t handle stress.
- I was tired, most of the year I found I was hitting a wall around 2pm, I was exhausted and lacked energy. Late last year I was told I had chronic fatigue and anxiety, which helps to explain why I was so tired.
Because of my lower back pain and fatigue, I stopped exercising and despite having gastric sleeve surgery I have put on weight. I didn’t put on weight purely for the lack of exercising, there is more to it, which I will share with you in another post, but I have booked in to see my GP for a full health check. This year I will be looking after myself and not allowing busy to get in the way of my health.
my shadow
Mostly though 2015 had a shadow over me, for those that may remember something happened to my blog mid-2014. I won’t go into detail and please don’t write anything in the comments, I’m sorry to those that don’t know what happened, however, legally I can not say but really need to share this.
I was overwhelmed by the response and support of my readers and the blogging community, I was so very very grateful. But very quickly after this happened, I was told legally I was unable to talk about it and I feel I never got to thank you, my readers and the blogging community and I feel bad I haven’t had the chance to do this. I stand tall with pride for standing up for what I believe in, what is right from wrong. However, this incident really affected me, I lost a little bit of drive, enthusiasm and somehow self-confidence. Despite the incident happening in 2014 it went through to 2015 and I felt like it was a shadow over me, I am a dweller and find it very hard to forget. I know I need to get over this. So just quickly I want to thank you. From today on, I am putting this behind me and moving forward.
blog comments
I am making some changes on the blog in 2016, I am working on making the site mobile friendly, but most importantly I am putting the personal me back into the blog and sad to say my assistant Kate will no longer be working with me. Kate helped me to reply to comments and type up newsletters, which was very helpful. But in 2016 I want to get to know you, my readers more and will be doing this all myself.
It is extra work, and to be kind to myself there maybe weeks that I won’t be publishing a blog post every day, instead I will spend the time chatting to you via the blog comments and social media. A happy balance.
new year, new me
I am really excited about 2016, I do have my enthusiasm back, kids are loving their school, we have our new house (which I am very excited to share with you), I feel I have my fatigue under control and I have a drive to get my health back on track. The kids got me a bike for my birthday and I am really enjoying riding around with them, makes me feel like a kid again.
This image above was shared by Lisa Messenger the editor of The Collective Hub, I’m only new to reading her magazine and have just loved it. I’m not one for reading books nor the words in magazines, but I can truly say this is where I have found my motivation and drive again to be that successful and happy me.
