This is a guest post by Alyce, from the blog Blossom Heart.
Greetings! My name is Alyce, and I over-think. Am I alone in this? Probably not, but maybe I am… I am a girl after all; us girls do like to over-think things. But maybe people will think I’m crazy, maybe it’ll sound like I’m talking to myself…
Being a stay-at-home mum, I can sometimes go days without much adult contact, other than my husband. Meaning that the only adult conversation I have is with myself. No, you won’t find me talking to myself aloud, although I do mutter at my children in the trolley as I wrestle it around the supermarket, but if you peek into my head you will often find me:
- Rehearsing conversations in my head;
- Writing mental to-do lists over and over;
- Worrying about potentially forgetting to get things done (like write this guest post until a couple of days before I needed to send it in);
- Analysing my behaviour – how is it being perceived by my husband, my children, my friends?
- Guilt-tripping over what I should be doing or should have done or should do but know I won’t…
Yep, it’s not a pretty sight sometimes. And one of the worst times for over thinking is when I lie down in bed at night and close my eyes. My husband falls asleep within minutes, whereas my brain frequently decides that in order to wind down it needs to re-process the day’s thoughts. But I have found that if I write these thoughts down, I can get my brain organised.
One of the best things I did for getting my brain practically organised was get a diary with a week per opening, with 3 rows for each day. It’s actually supposed to be used for different family members, but I’ve divided mine into Morning, Afternoon and Night.
Throughout the day, I’ll jot down the things I need to do as they come to mind, so that I can tell my brain to switch off and go to sleep instead of worrying about it and re-reminding myself.
Getting my brain emotionally organised isn’t quite as simple. I used to journal (the grown-up name for writing in a diary!), but that dropped away once I was married, and is now non-existent with kids. Now, blogging has been my outlet. I don’t get overly personal, but the friends I have made and the community I have become a part of are invaluable. I may not get to have coffee dates with them, but they live in my smartphone and I take them everywhere I go! Mummy bloggers share similar frustrations, similar struggles, similar joys. We get each other.
For a similar outlet with fellow mummies, try finding a new mums’ group – local councils and churches often have playgroups on a weekly basis. I still meet roughly once a month with my Child and Youth Health mums’ group at a playground and I have a weekly mums’ group at my church that I can count on being a highlight in a low week!
Being a stay-at-home mum can be isolating. Get out there, give it a go. You can do it!
Alyce is a mummy to Jon-son (2) and Darling (almost 1), married to a scientist, has Craft ADD, is moving to Japan in May for 3 years and doesn’t really have it all together as this post may imply. She blogs at Blossom Heart about life as a stay-at-home-mum and all that it entails – parenting, marriage, crafting, and anything else that strikes her fancy!
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